I have struggled (for what seems like an eternity) with such a simple principle of the gospel—faith. It is something that we sing about being like a seed, if planted it will grow and other pretty simple concepts. But faith, for me, it is not always so simple. I seem to question myself way too often. Do I have faith? Do I have enough faith? And just what is faith? And how can I have it if I don’t even know exactly what it is?
I tend to worry. These days I worry about my kids dying of the swine flu, and if or when my cancer will come back (again dying), and will the lymph nodes in my neck go down, and what will happen next, and please let nothing bad ever happen to us again. And then my faith departs and I can’t see out of all of the black clouds of the worries.
Repeat this process over and over….and you have the story of my life. The worries used to be, will I ever get married, will I ever have children, will I be happy, will I ever __________(fill in the blank.)
But today I found a glimpse of an answer….
I found the story of President Hinckley [15th president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints] talking to a young Korean man who had joined the church and was about to return to his home country and family. President Hinckley asked him what his family and others were going to think now that he was a Christian.
His response to President Hinckley was “It’s true, isn’t it?”
President Hinckley replied to him, “Yes, it’s true.”
The young man’s response, “Then what else matters?”
That was my answer.
Do I believe that there is a God that knows me, loves me and my family more than I can comprehend, and knows what is best for each of us?
Yes. With all my heart.
Do I believe in the Atonement of Jesus Christ, that I can return with my husband and children sealed to me, to live with Heavenly Father?
Then, seriously, what else matters?
(Can I sharpie that to my forehead next time I even start to question myself?)