A Mormons Woman’s story of conversion
~by Becky
I sat staring at the surf as I listened to the hypnotic rush of the waves. My feet were going deeper into the wet sand as it disappeared and then covered them again. It was one of those quiet moments, when, like it or not, my thoughts ran deep. It had happened before many times as I climbed the trees and sat up high staring at the sunset. Sometimes, it happened as I stared at the clouds as they formed into thunderheads or just floated into funny shapes as I gazed at them. It was in those quiet moments that eternity seeped into my consciousness. What I didn’t understand was the strange feelings that always accompanied these thoughts. It was a combination of a longing, a deep questioning, a yearning for something unidentified. Strong, sure beliefs of my own had formed in these meditative moments. I was absolutely sure that I did not just become me when I was born. Any other idea seemed absurd. I felt it in every fiber of my being: I am eternal. I also knew that somehow, some way I would have an eternal family of my own someday. The family I was born into never discussed either of these beliefs and it was not part of the doctrine of the church I had attended all my life. I also knew without a doubt that God was not some floating spirit out there who wasn’t real or who wasn’t interested in His children. I just knew that he and His Son, Jesus Christ, whom I loved dearly, were real and full of love.
I had read the Bible many times and it was as clear as anything could be to me that Jesus was talking to His Father, not to himself, in the scriptures. In fact, this was so obvious to me that I was shocked later to find out that my church, pastor, other believers, believed in a very incomprehensible thing to me; that God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit were all one being. How could that be? The Bible was clear-Jesus talked to His Father, His Father spoke to Him at his baptism and the Holy Ghost descended as a dove. To me, this was as clear as anything could be.
Even though I had these thoughts and beliefs of my own at the young age of 17, I wasn’t particularly unhappy or unsettled about it. I was going on in my church and didn’t imagine that the answers were even out there. The only thing that couldn’t stop disturbing my peace were those strong feelings! The deep emptiness and longing that I felt at times became the one thing I could not ignore. I didn’t expect the answer to these deep questions to come in the way that it did.
I was given a book with a name I had never heard of before, by a young man I was dating. It was blue with an angel blowing a trumpet on the front and the title was The Book of Mormon. When I opened the book and read it, I felt such an incredible feeling! I was filled with a burning peace and light like I had only felt once before. I had felt this same incredible feeling when I had come to know and accept Jesus was indeed my Lord and Savior. Now, as I read this book, I felt it again-this book was testifying of Him! This book was an ancient record from people that had lived on the American continent who had come from Jerusalem. They kept a record of their lives. Most of the record covers from 600 B.C. to 421 A.D. But, the part that was the most exciting was that Jesus Christ came to visit these people after His resurrection. I had always wondered about the scripture in John 10:16-who were these other sheep? Then I read in this new book of scripture where Jesus told them they are one of the “other sheep” he spoke about in the Bible. This book was scripture like the Bible! I was so excited!
Due to many persecutions and trials, it took me years to finally do something about my new-found knowledge that this book was true. In fact, I tried to go on without it. I tried to put it out of my mind. The price was so very high if I did do something about it. Due to many circumstances, I was not able to do anything about it until many years later. After 13 years of living without it, I knew I could no longer bear the emptiness, the cavernous hole inside of me. I knew I had to find the church that had this book. I did and was baptized into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. It was in my lessons to be baptized that I discovered the answers to those deep questions I had held all my life. Where did I come from? Why I am here? Where do I go after I die? All those questions were answered in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. It is glorious! It is incredible! Now, I look out at the clouds and no longer wonder-but I know with a knowledge that only the Holy Ghost can give. Yes, you are eternal; yes, you can have an eternal family; and yes, God, who is Heavenly Father, IS the Father of us all and Jesus Christ is His Son and the Holy Ghost testifies of all these truths. It is so wonderful, so sublime!
I hope you will seek out these answers too. They are right there before you! Go and find them, as I did–the greatest treasure you can have!
What an awesome story of conversion and how Heavenly Father really does know the desires of our hearts and is eager to answer our burning questions. Thanks Becky for sharing!
Becky, your story struck a similar chord in my heart… the majesty and the beauty of the world around us leads the honest in heart to a desire to know of their own beginnings…and Eternal possibilities. I too have experienced great joy within the pages of the Book of Mormon. Thank you for the love and upward reach you have shared with your profound conversion experience.
Becky,
I felt the Spirit as I read your story. It is so well written, too.
Thanks so much for sharing! You are an inspiration to me!
Vic
Becky,
Beautiful recount of your testimony. I’m glad Don and I were there when you joined the church! You are so awesome! Love you!
I love this “Portraits of Mormon Women” series. The stories are all so inspiring. I love what you said at the end of this, Becky: “I hope you will seek out these answers too. They are right there before you! Go and find them, as I did–the greatest treasure you can have!”
I believe that God (through the Holy Ghost) talks to us often, but we don’t always hear Him. It takes the still, silent moments like you describe in the opening paragraph to hear. We have to stop and listen.
Thank you for sharing!
Becky,
Our journey may have been a little different, but the Lord lead me and my brother (the young man you dated) to find the treasures and truths of His eternal gospel through the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints when we were teenagers.
What great love He has for his children! “For God so loved the world…” Thank you for the eloquence of your story – many of us share one that strikes that same beautiful chord. Love, Marina
Becky,
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I love your story and the way you have described your feelings and your deep desire to know the truth is so touching. I’m so glad that I have met you and am able to call you dear friend. You are truly an inspiration to us all.
Becky,
Those beautiful words will remind us all of the special gift we’ve been given. Your strong spirit is an inspiration to us all. Love, Patty
Dear Beck,
Oh my dear sweet sister. I was right there with you, in your words. You are a priceless gift to me in this worldly experience. I love you with all my heart and choose to take this journey with you. Thank you for finding me….again.
Love, Ann
Dear Becky,
What a powerful and profound story. I believe that our spirits have an eternal attachment to our Heavenly Father and even though the veil of forgetfulness has been placed upon our minds so that we can not remember our lives before this, there is a “spirit to spirit” connection between Father and His children. Atheist, Antagonist, or Christian, we all at some point in our lives, experience a yearning to know the reason for our existence. It is evident to me that the Lord has been mindful of you from the time you were a little girl. Thank you for sharing your story.