With Mother’s Day right around the corner for women in many parts of the world, several posts on motherhood have been swirling in my head.
I could give tips on what moms really want this Mother’s Day.
I could share my personal experiences with all the different mothers in my life and pay tribute to the women who are helping me to raise my children. Neighbors, preschool and piano teachers – I love you.
I could write a post memorializing my own good mother. And maybe I will!
But today I want to touch on a subject my friend and I talked about last night that indirectly applies to Motherhood: God’s love. My task-driven attempts to earn God’s approval as a mother are failing. I’ve been spinning my wheels checking all the right boxes day in and day out and despite the buzz of good works I’m building up, I have felt a spiritual distance developing. After recounting my day and the struggles I faced to my friend over the phone, she gently reminded me that I don’t need to earn God’s love. I already have it.
I let out a sigh and let that sink in.
I already have God’s love.
And that felt so RIGHT. I have felt it, I know God is there and what He has chosen to share with me of Himself is kind, gentle and entreating. That internal voice that scolds me for forgetting to bring in cut flowers for Teacher Appreciation day, the shame I feel as papers fly out every time I open the car door and the weariness I feel when I find my toddler has smashed strawberries into the carpet -AGAIN isn’t God. It’s me, or worse the devil, trying to discourage me from feeling God’s love.
To combat this effective trap of the adversary I am praying. Praying to feel God’s love. Praying to know that He accepts my sacrifice as a mother. Praying for access to His divine grace. Praying that He will multiply my efforts for the benefit of my family. Praying for the peace He promised for those who love Him.
John 14:27 Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you. Not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled neither let it be afraid.
I no longer want to trouble my heart with silly distractions. God and my family love me. Despite all of my weaknesses, and maybe even because of them, God and my family love me. And to all those mothers who are also fretfully spinning their wheels: God loves you too.
I wish you all a very peaceful Mother’s Day.