We recently had a question about the principle of tithing that I would like to address. As always, please remember that this site is not an official site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I’m just a Mormon sharing my perspective and trying to share information about our Church’s teachings, but for official info, you can look at lds.org or mormon.org.

Robin writes:

I have a question about tithing…I understand (as told to me by a neighbor who is LDS) that if you do not pay your tithes to the church that you will be deemed unworthy and unable to attend until you pay them current. This seems harsh to me. If you are so poor you can barely afford to live or just don’t have that 10% to give to the church it doesn’t seem right that you will be cast out. I don’t believe that God/Jesus cares about money in that way and certainly would not turn his back on you. What is the church’s reasoning for this one please?

As noted, I cannot speak for the Church officially, but I will share a few thoughts on what we are taught and what we believe about tithing.

Paying a full tithe (which is defined at 10% of your increase) is, indeed, a requirement to be able to attend the temple. Members of the Church who do not pay tithing are not “cast out” of the Church itself, however. They are just not able to attend the temple. Even this can seem harsh at the outset, but perhaps understanding the principles behind it might help.

In fact, one of the things you said in your comment reflects some of those principles. Tithing really isn’t about money. While we do live in a fallen world and tithing funds are used to help pay for the building of church buildings and temples (among other things), in truth, the principle of tithing at the individual level is about faith, trust in God, and sacrifice.

President Gordon B. Hinckley (a former prophet and president of the Church) said this about tithing:

Tithing is not so much a matter of dollars as it is a matter of faith. It becomes a privilege and an opportunity, not a burden. Our people believe in the word of God as set forth in the book of Malachi, that the Lord will open the windows of heaven and pour down blessings that there will not be room enough to receive them (Malachi 3:8-10).

Tithing is actually an ancient law given by God. We do believe God cares about us giving a tithe. It is a way for us to temporally participate in God’s work, but also a way to “prove God” and see how He will bless us for living the law. One of the greatest blessings is the opportunity and privilege to participate in temple ordinances, where truths and spiritual power can be poured out upon us and our families.

Joseph Smith said this about the law of sacrifice, which underlies the principle of tithing:

“A religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things never has power sufficient to produce the faith necessary unto life and salvation; for, from the first existence of man, the faith necessary unto the enjoyment of life and salvation never could be obtained without the sacrifice of all earthly things. It was through this sacrifice, and this only, that God has ordained that men should enjoy eternal life” (Lectures on Faith, comp. N. B. Lundwall [Salt Lake City: N. B. Lundwall, n.d.], p. 58).

The principle of tithing is one that ultimately is best understood by living it. If one is only looking at life from a temporal point of view, tithing may seem unnecessary or even unfair. But from a spiritual point of view, it’s a way for us to acknowledge that all we have really comes from God. Our time, talents, material means — all we have — is given to us to then choose to “spend” according to our desires and priorities. And yes, sometimes it may mean facing fears or temporal concerns and trusting that somehow He will care for us. Story after story from those who choose to pay tithing show how such blessings can come. But again, many of the blessings of this law really do end up being spiritual.

For more stories and perspectives and teachings on tithing, see lds.org

The story of the Widow’s Mite from the New Testament also captures some of the spirit of sacrifice that can come of being willing to give of our temporal means for the work of God.

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Are Mormons happier than others, even those of other faiths? It’s possible and here is one theory. It’s one thing to believe in a loving Heavenly Father who knows and cares about us. Many people of many faiths believe that and it makes them happier in life than those who don’t. It’s a whole other thing to actually be willing to give the time, energy, and commitment it takes to get to KNOW that loving Heavenly Father and love Him in return. Active Mormons commit their entire lives to this cause. We attend church for three hours each Sunday, sometimes more. Most of us spend some time during the week preparing for this Sunday worship. We spend Monday evenings [Family Home Evening] learning about the gospel and having fun with our families. Our youth go to a gospel activity night midweek each week, and seminary class every day, often in the early hours of the morning before school. Adults attend the temple and review covenants made their regularly. [Youth also participate in temple service.] We visit each other in our homes once a month. Our young men [where scouting is available] are encouraged to become Eagle Scouts, our young women complete a 100+ hour service and gospel-learning goal program. Young men, young women, and senior couples are encouraged to leave their regular lives for a time and at their own expense to serve missions. We have large families when possible because we believe there are many spirits waiting for their turn to come to earth, gain a body, and fulfill God’s plan to return to Him again in eternal family units. Twice a year we spend 8-10 hours on a weekend listening to those we believe are prophets and seers give us inspired direction for us to apply in our lives. We pray and read scriptures daily.

If there is a difference between Mormons and those of other faiths, I think perhaps this level of consecration of our lives is it. And I think our countenances reflect that. When we are baptized and confirmed into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we are given the gift of the Holy Ghost in a sacred ordinance. As we renew covenants from this ordinance every week in our sacrament meeting we are promised that His Spirit will always be with us as WE remember HIM always.

For me, as I spend my time immersed in all of these gospel oriented activities, I can remember Him more than I would otherwise. Having His Spirit with me, through the gift of the Holy Ghost, all of the time, IS happiness and peace. If you notice happiness in Mormons, I think this is why. This is the light you are seeing in our countenances.

Our founding prophet Joseph Smith said it this way:

“A religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things never has power sufficient to produce the faith necessary unto life and salvation; for, from the first existence of man, the faith necessary unto the enjoyment of life and salvation never could be obtained without the sacrifice of all earthly things. It was through this sacrifice, and this only, that God has ordained that men should enjoy eternal life.”

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by Heidi~

As a busy wife and mother, I often feel as if I am besieged by dozens of voices calling me to venture off in hundreds of directions.  Then there is the voice on top of all the rest, the one that questions which voice is the one that should be attended to first, or even at all.  It can be confusing, overwhelming and exhausting.  There are times, however, when a person can feel as if she is doing the right thing at the right time and the voices go quiet; when she is taking a shower after a hard work-out (no regrets there), when she is feeding her family a delicious and nutritious meal (I should really attempt that one more often) and, for me, when I am in the temple of the Lord. 

When I am in the temple, all the other voices are silenced, including the shrill one that is always questioning my choices and agonizing over the possible negative consequences.  “Maybe I should have put off the grocery shopping until tomorrow and done more to help my son with his homework today,” says the voice.  “It would probably be better to organize the garage this morning when it’s not too hot instead of taking a much-needed nap.”  And on and on it goes.  One of the greatest blessings of the temple, in my mind, is the peace and quiet that comes with knowing that I am in the right place at the right time.  Always. 

This does not mean that there are not sometimes negative consequences to temple attendance.  There are things that might not get enough attention or do not get done when and as they should, and there is always a concern when there are people in our home who need our care on a regular basis from whom we have taken time away.  Sometimes, the house you just cleaned up for the babysitter is in total chaos when you return home or an important phone call was missed or other things needing our attention are temporarily neglected.  Yet, if temple attendance were not a sacrifice, the blessings we receive through our attendance would not be as great.

Everyone who attends the temple sacrifices one or more of the following:  time, both that which is spent in the temple and the time spent getting to and from, money for transportation, whether by car or bus or some other means, or to pay a babysitter to be with your children, and/or energy that could be otherwise spent on things or situations that seem more urgent or pressing.  However, it is because we are willing to sacrifice in order to serve in the temple of God that we are blessed.  Sometimes the blessings are immediate simply through the peace I feel when I am there.  Sometimes it comes through the answer to an anguished prayer.  Sometimes, still, there are times when pushing aside my everyday responsibilities in order to go to the temple seems to lead directly to trouble and chaos.  When that happens, I hold fast to my faith in knowing that blessings directly related to my sacrifice await me and that the burden I endure in order to attend the temple will be relieved ten-fold in some unexpected or unimagined way.

In the end, the sacrifices I make in order to attend the temple are really more of an investment, the dividends of which are worth far more than anything I can produce on my own.  Like all sacrifices made in order the serve the Lord, temple service is something that pays us more than we can ever give.

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My friend and I caught up on family news over lunch a few months ago. “How‘s your son doing at college?” she asked as we reviewed our children’s activities.

“Did I tell you he’s on a two-year leave of absence so that he can complete a mission for our church?”

“No,” she replied.

“He’s been gone about six months. I’m looking forward to Mother’s Day because I get to talk to him on the phone. The only other time I can do that is on Christmas Day,” I explained.

“You’re kidding.” She shrugged. “That must be hard.”

I knew Sarah was putting her response mildly. Many non-LDS people can’t believe that a mother could send her child to a location anywhere in the world that is not her choosing for two years (18 months for women). “I’d never do that to my son,” an acquaintance once told me when we were discussing LDS missions.

Do I miss my son? Is it difficult to be apart for two years with only letters and emails to keep us connected? Do I worry about his health and how other people are treating him? You bet! Would I want it any other way? Absolutely not. My son is a bright, friendly young man who completed his freshman year at a Baltimore college before leaving on his mission. His college friends are supportive, but incredulous. Two months into his mission I received a letter that warmed my heart:

“I am grateful to be here and wish so much you could be here with me experiencing such miracles. What we get to do as missionaries . . . is so humbling. It is hard to describe . . . I want you to know that I love you more than you know and that I love our Savior and that I am glad you and certain others [helped] get me here.”

From Self-Centered to Self-Less

As parents, we want our children to have the best in life–the best opportunities, good friends, success in school, and health. From the time they are born, our children claim the center of our attention. If they cry as babies, our immediate goal is to eliminate any discomfort. We nurture and encourage, feed, clothe and provide shelter. Not surprisingly, our children respond by believing that their needs are more important than anything or anyone else.

We can counteract self-centered behavior when we teach our children to share their toys, when we ask for their help preparing dinner for a sick neighbor or when we assign our children chores, like taking out the garbage, to help our homes run smoothly.

Imagine what can happen when we focus entirely on helping others for an extended period of time. A mission is an incredible opportunity to do just that. My son spends six days a week dressed in a suit and tie, riding a bicycle, meeting and talking to anyone with an interest. He reserves one day a week [called preparation day, or P-day] for laundry, grocery shopping, and writing home. He has helped people move, clean, and do yard work. He assisted a single woman to stop smoking, encouraged an alcoholic father to give up drinking, introduced a single mother of two to a new “church family”–one that supports her by providing activities for her children and a place to socialize and discuss values that build families. He spends hours studying in order to effectively share his understanding of how to find joy with others. His letters include phrases like, “I have come to love him.” They describe tender experiences with people like the 93 year-old woman he met at a bus stop:

“She told us some moving stories about how she migrated here from Lithuania during World War II and how she went through all these hard times, but through it all gained a testimony of God. She didn’t really want to talk about our religion but it was just amazing to sit and listen to her.”

Developing Skills & Talents

Mormon missionaries work as pairs. They are assigned a companion to live and work with. Learning to get along with companions from a variety of different backgrounds teaches tolerance and patience—valuable skills for any friend or future spouse. My brother-in-law recalled that his mission was where he had learned to be a “better father and husband.”

Missionaries serve without compensation, many earning the $400 a month required for service before leaving for the “mission field” or assigned area. Missionaries receive a modest monthly amount to pay for food, expenses like bike repairs or a haircut. My son is developing budgeting skills and learning how to be frugal. He proudly sent me a photograph of one of his “budget dinners”—a bowl full of noodles sprinkled with something resembling shrimp.

Before he left, my Stake President (congregational leader) advised my son to utilize his talents on his mission. My son is serving an English-speaking mission, but many missionaries learn foreign languages as they serve in countries around the world. “I’ve played the piano just about every week in church,” my son reported a few weeks into his first mission area (missionaries can be transferred to a new area as frequently as every six weeks). At college, my son was a music minor who taught piano and played the saxophone in a jazz ensemble. He describes a memorable event in another letter:

“This Saturday night will be our musical fireside. I am pretty much organizing and playing every song. It’s gonna be sweet. We have choral numbers, quartets, guitar and piano medleys. I have a couple of solos, and even one of our investigators and I are playing some gospel versions and hymns. My favorite is our arrangement with the whole zone singing Come Thou Fount as well as a medley of Praise to the Man and We Thank Thee, O God, for a Prophet where I get to go wild! I’m excited.”

Blossoming Leadership

Six months into his mission my son was assigned to be a “trainer”—a senior companion who tutors new missionaries on how to accomplish their duties. A trainer sets an example of leadership by demonstrating hard work, spiritual strength, and a willingness to meet and teach others even when it is difficult or uncomfortable.

During his ninth month of service, he became a “district leader” with responsibility for six missionaries in his area. In addition to tracking their physical well-being, my son prepares weekly training sessions. “[I] . . . planned a meeting about unity since the district is pretty new and we don’t know each other,” he wrote home. He noted that during a role play activity the sister (female) missionaries, “just went at it, tearing into each other . . . loud enough that everyone else in the room could hear—very uncomfortable.” One of the sisters called later that night to say that the role play was just what she and her companion needed to work out their differences.

Developing Spiritual Maturity

It is easy to put our finger on the tangible elements of success–a college degree, a thriving career, a comfortable home or opportunities for interesting travel. These elements are important, but they are only part of what I believe is a complete life, one that includes helping others and feeding our spiritual hunger–the search for answers about the meaning of our existence, what it means to have peace, and where we can find the ultimate source of our desire to be “good.”

I believe we learn truth through the heart as well as through the mind. Knowing and understanding spiritual truths is what I (and most Mormons) call a testimony. It begins with a feeling in the heart–a warm sense when we do something good or learn something that rings true. Consider a time when you did something that made you feel good. At work, I have had several opportunities to volunteer in my community serving lunch at a homeless shelter, planting trees at a local zoo, and setting up tables for a fundraising dinner for a non-profit foundation. I came away from these activities feeling happy that I was able to do something worthwhile. These warm feelings are the same “messages of the heart” sent from God that can come when we learn spiritual truths or truths that bring us pure joy.

On his mission, my son has been able to cultivate and refine his quest for spiritual truth in order to share it with others. Excerpts from several letters describe his growing spiritual maturity:

“We see miracles all the times, what a privilege.”

“The Lord truly blesses us when we always do what we are supposed to do.”

“This week I am focusing on faith, always believing anything can happen. Such a simple principle but hard to actually do. . .”

“This week I want to just bear my testimony. I know the church is true, without a shadow of a doubt.”

I Would Do It All Over Again

The brief conversation I had with my friend over lunch is something I hope to repeat many times in the upcoming months. I enjoy explaining what my son is doing as an LDS missionary and how I feel about it as his mother.

When my son returns from his mission, he will be two years older and no further along in school –but he will have developed a number of priceless character traits. He will return a sensitive, giving, talented, and spiritual mature leader who will have lifted the lives of the many people he will have met, served, and taught.

Would I do it all over again? Of course.
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For more Missionary Mondays posts, please click here.

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We are so grateful to know that there are prophets and apostles alive on the earth today, here to guide us and help us follow the Savior, Jesus Christ.

If you feel inspired to do so, please consider sharing your thoughts about what you have heard on this video, or about how General Conference messages helped you.

The post <i>Review, Reflect, and Return</i>: General Conference Highlights Video appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

“We Announce the Martyrdom…” was inspired by Geoffrey Brock’s “Flesh of John Brown’s Flesh: Dec. 2, 1859”, written from John Brown Jr.’s point of view. I was interested Brock’s representation of this son’s complex feelings towards his father. In response to this poem, I composed my own; instead of exploring the Prophet’s children’s feelings surrounding his death, I decided to focus on Emma’s reaction.

On a personal note, I enjoyed researching the history of Joseph’s faith and sacrifice and Emma’s role as an influential, yet often overlooked founder of our faith. Lucy Mack Smith said of her: “I have never seen a woman in my life who would endure every species of fatigue and hardship, from month to month, and from year to year, with that unflinching courage, zeal and patience, which she has ever done.” Emma was a pregnant widow when Joseph was killed, staying on in Nauvoo to care for their children and the prophet’s feeble mother. Let us continue to remember her as her family did; she was truly an elect lady.

The poem follows.

“We Announce the Martyrdom of Joseph Smith the Prophet, and Hyrum Smith the Patriarch”: Carthage Jail, 27th June 1844

Men charged the stairs,
their faces black.
Did they hear Brother Taylor’s singing stop?

But Joseph knew
and like a lamb, he went
as independently, this work rolled on without him

through persecutions—
mobs, armies, calumny
and kin.

The Patriarch fell, then the Prophet:
(their blood still stains the floor)
never divided, never separated.

Their legacy of faith, we live
ingrained in us, the children of the covenant.
But what of you, Sister Emma?

To Joseph’s heart, yours—
once entwined
in Harmony—

Held fast through New York,
Ohio,
Missouri and Illinois.

Six tiny graves you left behind
while Zion’s monuments were built and razed,
consumed by the cause.

Crossing the frozen Mississippi
with his manuscript sewn into your skirt,
his children clung to you.

Your love lost,
your sickened soul lingered behind the flow of the faithful—
the Prophet’s widow, witnessing his people’s exodus—

What of your vision?
Your suffering and sacrifice?
How far need endless enduring go?

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(For more information about the participants in the documentary and the movie (“Between Heaven and Earth” from which these clips come, click here.)

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