An article about Elder David Bednar by Elder Henry B. Eyring that I read recently gives some specific insights into how God helps people accomplish difficult things. Elder Eyring quotes Michael, Elder Bednar’s son:

“It seems that faith has driven out fear in my dad. He is always optimistic. No matter what goes wrong, he always says, ‘Things will work out.’ When it was hard for me during my mission, he told me to work hard and success would come. And he told me when the success came to remember that God gave it and that I did not earn it.”

This quote illustrates how faith drives out fear. When I have faith and a belief in God my life is  impacted positively by hope. Especially because I believe in a God that is omnipotent and loving towards us, his children. ‘Things will work out’ because I believe that even difficult things can result in good. It creates a dedication that is inspired and optimistic. Elder Bednar later says, “Because we know who is in charge and that we are not alone… I am not scared.” When I am truly living what I believe and feel close to God I’m not scared either.

The last part of the quote points out a facet of giving glory to God, “..when the success came to remember that God gave it and that I did not earn it.” Believing in a God that is creator of all, I attribute all that I physically have as given to me by God. I was born helpless and unable to work. Only because God gave me life within the context of a family was I able to grow to the point that I can care for myself and others. God has placed me where I am through birth and blessings. I can work hard and do good, but without his instruction on what is worth working for and how best to accomplish it, the work would result in little or nothing.

In the article, another son was quoted, describing Elder Bednar:

“’Since I was little, Dad taught me to set goals and exercise faith.’ Jeff also says: ‘I want people to know that he is an ordinary man who can do extraordinary things because of the strength of the Lord.'”

Setting goals and exercising the type of faith I mentioned earlier are keys to moving forward. People who believe in religion usually also believe that our lives have purpose. Usually that purpose includes improvement of the individual. In church I have been taught how to improve my life through setting goals, having standards and working hard to achieve. Without a belief in God and the ability for humans to improve, I would flail miserably in life, not understanding my potential and struggling without direction.

“Elder Bednar remembers: ‘During my training before my mission, we went to the solemn assembly room in the Salt Lake Temple. President Harold B. Lee was there to answer questions from about 300 missionaries. He stood there in his white suit, holding his white scriptures. He answered every question from the scriptures, or he said, ‘I don’t know.’ I sat there and thought that I would never be able to know the scriptures the way he did, but my objective became to use the scriptures in my teaching the way that I saw President Harold B. Lee do it. That desire is the genesis of all my scripture study.'”

Scripture study is something that is important to Christians. Some would say that it’s brainwashing on a daily basis to study scriptures every day. I would respond that the best way to keep myself focused on my goals is to have a daily reminder of what I want to accomplish and why. Prayer has a similar effect on my life.

Another benefit of scripture study and prayer is in keeping people humble. If on a daily basis I recognize that I need instruction and help, I am recognizing my own lack, my need to depend on something greater than myself. In work situations I see that people who are humble are more willing to listen to other’s ideas, they are not as easily threatened or offended, and are willing to do whatever is asked of them. These are qualities of a great employee and/or leader who accomplishes great things by working well with people.

These are just a few reasons that religious persons may give thanks and glory to God. I’m sure if you asked each person individually why they thank God they would have very specific and personal examples to share. God is my constant counselor so it is hard to divide those things in my life that have happened because of my own efforts and which have come about because of God. He is a part of all that I do, it really is indivisible.  Except when I really mess up, I’ll claim that for myself!

The post “Thanks to God!” appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

When I was pregnant with my daughter I told everyone that I hoped I was having a boy. Looking into the future I didn’t think I could handle being the mother of a teenage daughter – all those hormones, boys, and friend issues – a minefield for a parent. I knew how I was as a teenager, and I did not want to deal with that!

Now that I’m in the middle of it, it is not the horror I feared. It’s probably because my daughter isn’t just ‘some teenager,’ she’s my daughter. The baby who somehow survived my first feeble attempts at buckling her into a carseat. The little girl who rode her first bike with slippers on because it was softer to pedal that way. The girl who moved across the country right before 6th grade and never got mad at her parents for it, despite the difficulty. And now she is the teenager who gets up at 5 am every school day to attend seminary (religious education).

Yes, teenagers do have hormones, we all do. She probably understands me best on my bad days because she’s had a few inexplicable bad moments herself. Boys really aren’t much of an issue just yet, for now she thinks most of them act like her 7-year-old brother. When that day does come I will be nervous, but I’ll also be happy for her, remembering the excitement of my first date. I can’t think of a person better equipped to help her deal with friend issues than someone who has had (and continues to have) friend issues herself.

My daughter and I were out in public once when an older person went out of their way to walk far around her. She looked at me quizzically.
“Some people are afraid of teenagers,” I said.

“Oh, yeah, we’re so scary.”

I should tell her I used to be scared too.

The post Teenagers aren’t Scary! appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

When my son is eight years old he’ll have a birthday party with his friends. We don’t do friend birthday parties every year, it is too much expense and effort and I enjoy having a family only birthday every other year. For family parties the focus is on the child and their big day, not on the guests.

When my son is eight years old our family will come to visit. We live in the Northeast United States while most of our family lives in the West. We really miss having our family nearby. There are many aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, and extended family to miss because my husband and I are both from large families. We keep our family close through email, phone calls, blogging and visits. Not every child gets a visit from Grandma and Grandpas at their birthday though. Turning eight years old is a big deal, so it merits special visits.

When my son is eight years old he will be baptized. In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints children are baptized when they reach an age at which they are mentally able to be accountable for their choices. Through prophets we know that that age is eight. It is a rite of passage, as well as a sacred ordinance. After his baptism I will expect a little more from my son. He has had eight years to learn about consequences, sin, and repentance so after his baptism those concepts will be reality for the rest of his life. Not that I will expect him to be perfect, but I expect him to use what he knows.

When my son is eight years old he will receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. This is an important part of becoming baptized. When we are baptized we covenant with God to obey his commandments. It can be difficult to obey the commandments and the Holy Ghost can be with us to remind us of what is right and to help us make good choices. Although we can have the Holy Ghost with us, we must be worthy and receptive to its promptings to continue to have its influence in our life.

When my son is eight years old he will become a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. As a member of the church my son will share membership with wonderful people who have also covenanted to keep the commandments and serve Jesus Christ. In his fellowship with the church he will have opportunities to learn and grow in ways not available anywhere else. My son will be counted as one of the believers.

“Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.” 1Tim 4:12

When my son is eight years old I will be so proud of him and amazed at how much he has grown since that first day I held him in my arms. While all of this may seem like a lot to expect from an eight year old, it really isn’t. Because behind every moment of my son’s life lies this truth – That Jesus Christ is his Savior and will help him.

The post When My Son is Eight appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

~by Jenny**

The ways that Mormons celebrate the holidays are varied. Because we are part of a worldwide church, and tend to include long-standing family and cultural traditions in our celebrations, this discussion is about those traditions as well as Mormon traditions. I have enlisted the help of several women for this post to help exemplify the differences in Mormon celebrations.

There are certain aspects of our faith that require us to tweak traditions on occasion, such as eliminating alcohol from our festivities. We are also encouraged to keep the main focus of our celebrations on the Savior.

A Catholic neighbor once asked me, “I know that you believe in Jesus and celebrate Christmas, but why don’t you have church services on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day?” That was a year that Christmas fell on a weekday, so we didn’t have an organized church service on Christmas Day or Christmas Eve (which we do when the holiday is on a Sunday). There have been times that I have longed to bundle up my family to attend a candle-lit service in a church with ornate stained-glass windows at midnight on Christmas Eve. It is a beautiful tradition. But at the same time I don’t feel that the Mormon Church is not revering Christ or celebrating his life by not participating in this specific tradition.

Kathryn shares this about her Mormon congregation’s Christmas celebrations:

My ward has a Christmas program on the Sunday before Christmas. The ward choir sings magnificent Christmas music [much like other churches’ Christmas Day/Eve service]. A narrator reads scriptures regarding the birth and mission of Christ to introduce each musical number.

Earlier this month, our congregation had a Christmas party on a Saturday night. We all were assigned to bring part of the dinner. I brought a yummy raspberry jello salad. After dinner, the teenagers sang a Christmas song and two of the teens also sang a lovely duet about Mary and the Christ Child. The highlight of the evening was the nativity program presented by the children ages 3-11. There is nothing quite as adorable as little kids dressed up as sheep and angels. A narrator read the Christmas story while the children sang. Occasionally, the entire congregation was asked to sing ‘We Three Kings’ or ‘Silent Night’. Having the ward Christmas party helps remind us of the true meaning of the Christmas season—it truly is a celebration of the glorious birth of our Savior.

On Christmas Eve each family has their own intimate traditions. Many love to read the Christmas story from Luke, while acting out the nativity scene with homemade costumes. Our church does not have paid clergy, so church leaders have the gift of spending Christmas Eve with their families instead of officiating at a church service.

My congregational celebrations are similar, but not identical to, the events that Kathryn experiences. Our Christmas church service is also on the Sunday proceeding Christmas but we have no choir (because we are a small group, with many new to the church not experienced at singing). So our meeting is made up of talks given by members of the congregation, as well as congregational hymns, and a few individuals with musical abilities share Christ-focused musical numbers. Often this takes place in Spanish and English languages, with translators helping us all understand what is being said.

Our Christmas party is also multi-cultural. (Our party is not the same every year, but these are some of the things we’ve done in the past.) We have a potluck dinner where there is Latin food from all over the world, with tropical fruits as a special treat, as well as a few traditional American foods. The children are also a focus at our evening, usually they sing a song or act out the Nativity and then are presented with gifts. Many children in our area come from low-income homes so this is our chance to add to their Christmas. Then the dancing begins! Our Latin members love to dance, but the dancing always starts just as my family is wearing out! So we dance a little but leave it to everyone else to dance into the night to celebrate the joyful event of the Savior’s birth.

Many Latin church members have great parties on Christmas Day, as they feel that this is the best way they can share their love of the Savior, by welcoming many friends and family into their homes.

Heidi shared that when her parents were in England, serving as missionaries, the LDS church did have church services on Christmas Eve. She thought this might be a way for the church to honor England’s long-standing cultural tradition of a Christmas Eve service. Something that her parents appreciated about the Christmas season in England is a feeling that Christmas is more of a cultural event, with plays, concerts, dinners, etc., rather than a commercial event.

Michelle reminded me that the Mormon church has a worldwide Christmas celebration early in the month of December. It is called the Christmas Devotional. It takes place in Utah, the location of the headquarters of our church, and is broadcast via satellite and internet throughout the world. It is full of music and words from our leaders about Christ and the best parts of the Christmas season, such as charity and hope. The benefit to the broadcast is that it is recorded and we can watch and re-watch the Devotional throughout the Christmas season. It is a wonderful way to start the month focused on Christmas because it is a reminder that Jesus Christ is the reason for Christmas.

We also have church magazines – the Ensign, Liahona, New Era, and Friend, geared towards various age groups – whose December edition is dedicated to Christmas. Recently the church started a website that is all about celebrating Christmas with an emphasis on Christ. The grounds of several of our temples are decorated with holiday lights and large crèches to visually celebrate Christ’s birth. As part of our regular assignments to visit each other in our homes (called visiting and home teaching), many people visit other church members and neighbors to share holiday cheer through caroling and/or giving a plate of homemade goodies.

I think most Mormons try to keep the focus on Christ, but it can be difficult when children are so excited to see what presents they will receive. Most families I know do keep the tradition of Santa’s visit, but it is only one aspect to a month-long celebration, most of which we try to keep focused on Christ.

Christmas is a wonderful time of year in which we can more fully share our love of the Savior with the world. I appreciate the warm feelings I get of family, community, peace, and love. There is always something that strengthens my faith in Christ. Christmas is the perfect opportunity to think about our relationship with Christ and prepare ourselves for the start of a new year.

Watch for a post about LDS New Years celebrations in two weeks.

Tell us about your Christmas celebrations, especially if we’ve missed something that is important in your culture!

**Please note: The answers in “Ask a Mormon Woman” reflect the thoughts, perspectives, and experiences of individuals. Although here at Mormon Women: Who We Are, we strive to have our content consistent with the Church’s doctrine and teachings, we do not speak officially for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. For official information about or from the Church, please visit www.mormon.org or www.lds.org.

The post Ask a Mormon Woman: How Do Mormons Celebrate Christmas? appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

Usually we have a weekly feature on Mormon Women called ‘Ask A Mormon Woman.’ Today we’ve turned the tables, and we’re asking you a question!

If you are here, on the Mormon Women website, chances are that you’re at least a little curious about the Mormon religion. Maybe the missionaries knocked on your door and you said, “No, thank you.” But now you’re wondering about something they said, or about the pamphlet they left, but aren’t sure you want to call them back. Perhaps you have a friend from high school that was Mormon and you look back and wish you had asked her some questions. It could be that someone you work with turned down an invitation to drinks after work, mentioning that they are Mormon and don’t drink alcohol. Now you wonder what else your co-worker believes. These, and many others, are reasons that this website exists.

There is another way for you to get personal answers to your questions in a friendly, non-confrontational way. Chances are that there is a Mormon woman in your community, maybe even someone you already know, who would like to share her faith with you. I’m a Mormon woman and I’d also like to share my faith with those that I know in real life in a friendly and non-confrontational way. Could you give me your opinion about how I should actually go about doing it?

A few people have accused Mormons of being preachy or overbearing. Mormons hear about this and become timid about sharing their faith. You could have a Mormon neighbor and not even know it. We’re not being secretive about our religion, we’re only trying to be respectful of your religious choices and our own. And I must admit we are afraid of possible negative reactions.

Elder L. Tom Perry of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles recently told the LDS people, “..over one-half of the people in the United States and Canada have little or no awareness of our practices and beliefs. I am certain the percentage would be much larger in other parts of the world. This same survey also showed that when non-members interact with faithful members of the Church over an extended period of time or are exposed to clear and accurate information regarding Church beliefs and doctrines, their attitudes become positive and open.”

The LDS church membership is encouraged to share what they believe with their neighbors and friends. Some would say we do this only to increase our numbers. We do want all to feel welcome in our church, the Savior directs us to share his gospel with others. And we want to share because of what it all means to us. The gospel brings us so much peace and perspective.

But there is another reason, a reason Elder Perry mentions. We want to communicate clearly with the world who we are. We firmly believe in freedom of religion and that includes your choice not to belong to ours. But we also want you to understand what we believe, or don’t believe.

Thank you for seeking out active members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints who are trying to be faithful to their religion to learn about what our lives and beliefs are like. And please, don’t forget to leave a comment to give us a little advice on how to let you know who we are, without making you feel uncomfortable.

The post A Mormon Woman Asks You appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

At the impressionable age of nine, Emily witnessed the murder of her 13-year-old sister at the hands of their own mother. After hearing this one fact about Emily, probably much like you, I wanted to know more about her. Thankfully she has an open heart, even after all she has been through, and is willing to share it with us. However, this is not about relating the negative experiences that Emily had to endure as a child, it is about the healing that she has found since that time.

After growing up abused, and in foster care and adoptive homes Emily didn’t have a good attitude towards religion, families, or her own body. Emily was not a Mormon at this time of her life. She admits that she tends to think in a scientific way, needing evidence for belief. She was not looking for religion or change, but it came anyway. Her change of heart began with an interest in ballroom dance.

As she took ballroom dance lessons she learned many true principles that she had little experience with in her life before. Because of the physical abuse that Emily suffered she felt disconnected from her body, although she didn’t realize it. Through dance she was forced to think about her body, to feel it, to focus on how it helped her. The healing of  negative emotions associated with her body began on the dance floor. It taught her to be present in her body in a way that hadn’t happened before.

Through dance Emily began to learn the power of relationships- that when each person in the relationship does his or her part there is a wonderful reward. This would later lead to her comprehension of the importance of covenants.

Emily’s dance instructor was a positive influence in her changing life. She spent time with his family and it was an eye opening experience after the abnormal family situations she grew up in. Getting to know his family taught her entirely new ideas about families. She never felt the need for a father before, not the kind she had seen anyway. But now she saw a new type of father – loving, supportive, kind – maybe she could use that kind of Heavenly Father.

There is no doubt in Emily’s mind that without the lessons she learned in dance she would not have been able to understand, or have a heart soft enough, to accept the gospel of Jesus Christ.

There is something I haven’t told you about Emily that may surprise you. She is Deaf. That’s right, a ballroom dancer who is Deaf. Just chalk up another “Wow!” in her story. Keep reading, because there are more.

Emily’s dance instructor asked for her help in return one day. He was attending a job fair at church and found someone who was also Deaf who needed a job. He asked Emily if she had any leads. It impressed Emily that this church would provide interpreters for the Deaf, because they are so hard to come by at other congregations she’s attended, so she asked what church it was. She didn’t even know what the name of the church meant! Thank heavens for the internet because that’s where she found Mormonism – Mormon.org and then later LDS.org.

It was not an overnight process for Emily though. She doesn’t want anyone to think it was that easy. It took nine months from that first missionary contact until she was baptized just last week.

“I was like a broken glass that had to be slowly and patiently fused back together so that I would be present and whole and able to make that choice. If people had been disrespectful or pushy, it would have shattered me, and I would not have made the choice to convert.”

The process of investigating the gospel started with talking to the missionaries. Emily read the Book of Mormon many times. She focused on Moroni 10:

“Behold, I would exhort you that when ye shall read these things, if it be wisdom in God that ye should read them, that ye would remember how merciful the Lord hath been unto the children of men, from the creation of Adam even down until the time that ye shall receive these things, and ponder it in your hearts.

“And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost.

“And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things.” Moroni 10:3-5

As Emily’s studies went on she also made changes in her life. She had been living with a man she was not married to, so she moved out and into a tiny apartment at a financial loss. Her eating and drinking habits changed. Her wardrobe became more modest, due to her righteous desires, but also due to a mystery gift box of modest clothing. She learned to tithe and re-read the Bible with an increased understanding of her place in God’s plan.

Looking back the change seems huge to Emily, but really it wasn’t. It was a culmination of little steps, a progressive sequence. At any point her progress could have been stopped. Emily’s confidence that it has all unfolded as it should can give us all peace in troubled times.

This step-by-step process is similar to how she views her baptism. It is a large step to take in her life, but she knows it doesn’t mean she is perfect. It is just another step in the path to get closer to her Heavenly Father. It is another beginning.

Join us Thursday to see what Emily has been doing since her baptism.

The post Conversion Stories: Emily (part 1) appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

We may joke and roll our eyes but at some point in everyone’s life it is really worth taking a peek into your family’s past. I tried it, and guess what? It was fun! It’s family reunion and private investigation all rolled into one. But you provide your own watermelon and take it at your own pace.

It’s easy to start. Print out a simple family tree, also called a pedigree chart. Start with yourself and see how much you can fill in without asking anyone else. Then ask a relative for help – Mother, Grandmother, Aunt or Uncle. Or look at a family Bible or other such book. The first time I tried this it amazed me what I didn’t know. How could I not know my own grandmother’s maiden name? And dates, well I didn’t know any of those!

Most likely by the time you fill out a pedigree chart you will be curious about some aspect of your family. Where did they come from? Why is their name different? That person was adopted? Hm…that birth date is awfully close to the parents’ wedding date…. You just never know what you’re going to find!

As you may have heard, the Mormon Church is very excited about genealogy, sometimes called family history. We just love families! Many LDS meetinghouses include a family history center. They have computers, microfilm readers, books, and most important of all – knowledgeable staff to help guide your research. Check out this link for the family history center near you. The centers are a service to the community, free of charge. No proselytizing goes on in family history centers so there is no need to feel uncomfortable going there. (You can also find much information online at Family Search — a free database of millions of digitally indexed records. You can even help index records here.)

There is a bit of urgency to family history work. My husband’s energetic Grandma now has dementia. Somehow the fibers of her mind have let those stories she held so dear slip away. But because of her previous family history efforts the records of her family are secure for generations to come.

The post We Believe: Finding Family is Fun! appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.