For 12 months or more I have been a distracted disciple. A year ago we sold our home in hopes of finding the “perfect” place (within budget constraints) to raise our family in California. I now know that this search for perfection has distracted my mind and heart away from God. Since moving three times in one year, we found three things out about ourselves:

1. A bigger house didn’t make us any happier.
2. A spiffy neighborhood didn’t make us happier.
3. Our children attending a higher rated school didn’t make us any happier.

What previously made us happy was the people we served, the interconnectedness and interdependence of our previous neighborhood and lives. We have met and loved new people while living in our rental homes, but because we saw ourselves as transient, we didn’t throw ourselves into serving our neighbors and ward members. What a mistake! We sought to find ourselves a new life, but our self interest left us spiritually adrift.

About six months ago I realized I was off track and committed myself to follow a self-made discipleship chart. My chart included regular family prayer, family scripture study, service, temple work and visiting teaching with the assumption of keeping the commandments. I did okay, and admittedly was doing better than the months prior to starting my chart, but at the end of a few weeks of dutifully following my chart I was left feeling overwhelmed and undernourished. I learned that goals are good, and should be made to make me a more effective servant of the Lord, but true discipleship wasn’t in check-marks and to-do lists.

Months passed, and I continued to think about discipleship. Some clarity came to me while listening to our Primary sing “Love One Another” during sacrament meeting last Sunday. This song led me to ponder on some of my favorite teachings of Jesus Christ.

Mark 8: 35-36

35 For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel’s, the same shall save it.
36 For what shall it profit a man, if he shall again the whole world (or a perfect house), and lose his own soul?

John 13: 34-35

34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye alove one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.

Matthew 22: 36- 40

36 Master, which is the great commandment in the law?
37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.
38 This is the first and great commandment.
39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.
40 On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.

In these scriptures I found a key to becoming a better disciple: love. I also found my perfect place to live: with God. What I missed most about my old life was how connected I felt to the Lord. I felt Him guiding me to serve my neighbors and friends. Realizing that loving God and serving others is what brings me happiness, has reduced the pressure to find the “perfect” place to live. Opportunities for love and service can be found everywhere. I don’t need to be a distracted disciple any longer. I can recommit. I can reconnect. I can repent. I can learn to love God “with all my heart, all my soul and all my mind” again.

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To read more on discipleship please read the following articles.

The Path of Discipleship – By Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Discipleship by James E. Faust

Christian Courage: The Price of Discipleship by Robert E. Hales

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While visiting with my friend, she asked me some questions regarding where I would attend church after moving to a nearby town.

Kathy: “So I hear you’re moving.”

Me: “Yep.”

Kathy: “That’s too bad.”

Me: “Yeah, I know. I really loved living here.”

Kathy: “Mrs. P (our daughters’ kindergarden teacher, who happens to be LDS) said that when you move you’ll be attending church at her building instead of the Mormon church down the street.”

Me: “That’s right. There is another LDS meetinghouse closer to our new house so we’ll be going to church there from now on.”

Kathy: “But I heard your Dad is the bishop of the ward that meets at the building nearest us. Won’t that be hard to attend church in a new place without your family?”

Me: “Sure, I’ve grown up my entire life in this same ward. I love these people, my entire congregation, like they are family members.”

Kathy: “So why would you do that? Why can’t you just go to whatever church you want to?”

Me: “Well, there are a couple of reasons. First, in our church, the same doctrine is taught all over the world. So changing ward houses does not change what is taught in Sacrament meeting, Sunday School or Relief Society. My children will have the exact same lessons as well. Second, my Dad will not be the bishop forever. In our area, bishops only serve for 5 years or so and then another worthy man will be called to serve in his place.”

Kathy: “But if you love all the people in your congregation, why not just keep attending the ward with the people you grew up with regardless of where you live?”

Me: “Well, if everybody did that, there would be huge numbers of people attending the same congregation because it’s ‘fun’ or ‘comfortable’ there. By following the guide to attend our assigned ward we get to ‘lift where we stand‘ and learn to serve the people who live around us. I’m sure we’ll grow to love these new people as much as the old congregation. And if everyone follows this guide, then the entire church will be blessed for their faithfulness with the opportunity for service.”

I’ve lived in the same ward all of my life, so I had a tough transition moving out of my “home” ward. For six months I attended my old ward while living outside of the ward boundaries, but my husband and I never felt good about it. We finally decided to make the move spiritually as well as physically. Last week was our first week in our new ward. And guess what? We loved it.

After making that good decision, my husband read this Ensign article about a woman who was only going to live in a ward for three months and how she made the best of the three short months she was there. This article made him wish that we had made the decision to change wards even sooner. One thing we LDS people always say after attending church while traveling is “The church is true no matter where you go.” I guess that saying now rings true for me here, there and everywhere. Even when everywhere is just down the road.

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