During Education Week at BYU, Elder Bednar asked that we flood the internet with our testimonies. He said, “My beloved brothers and sisters, what has been accomplished thus far in this dispensation communicating gospel messages through social media channels is a good beginning—but only a small trickle. I now extend to you the invitation to help transform the trickle into a flood. Beginning at this place on this day, I exhort you to sweep the earth with messages filled with righteousness and truth—messages that are authentic, edifying, and praiseworthy—and literally to sweep the earth as with a flood.”

So I am going to share my thoughts and testimony of Jesus Christ.

My name is Michelle Iverson. I am a wife, mother, teacher, writer, missionary, and disciple of Jesus Christ and I believe that love is a super power!

It is a power we use in everyday life as we care for our families and friends, serve others through our work and church callings, and share the gospel. But there are also those defining moments in life where we get to find out what we are made of and it is in those moments that we can call on love to help us make it through.

When I was a very little girl I was sexually abused by my grandfather. This was a very scary experience for me that continued on for many years. I felt confused because I really loved my grandpa and I loved myself, but what I was experiencing made me wonder if I should love either one.

Those early defining moments in my life created a wall around my heart. I no longer saw myself through eyes of love. In fact, I hated myself. When I looked in the mirror, I could never see who I really was. I saw something so far from the truth. I could only see a broken, ugly, and unlovable image looking back at me. I carried secrets and those secrets were heavy and dark.

As I grew up and started to date, I realized that I had some serious issues with trust and commitment. I saw men as untrustworthy, and so that is what I often attracted and experienced in my relationships. Several years after I returned from serving a mission, I met and married Tyler. A couple of years into our marriage, I discovered he was struggling with a pornography addiction. All of the fears and insecurities I had carried my whole life were unleashed again, and I was left wondering if there was a single man on the planet I could truly trust with my heart.

Here it was, another defining moment. I remember praying and venting all of my pain, loneliness, and anger to Heavenly Father one night. I laid next to Tyler and quietly cried in the dark. I was angry, but I knew that if I was ever going to heal my heart and the incorrect perceptions I had of myself, I had to learn how to love and it had to start with me.

Throughout my life, I have found that the overriding lesson here on earth is love. We are given many experience where we learn how to wield our superpower with faith and humility. True love, the kind that heals lives and changes hearts, comes from Christ. He is the source of our power and I have seen his grace and light work wonders in my life and literally “save the day” in the most heroic ways. Anything I have been able to overcome is only because of him. He has healed my heart, my children, and my husband.

My greatest desire is to love as he loves, and life is giving me many opportunities to practice. It is the difficult things we face that carve out a deeper reservoir of light within us and allow us to use our powers for good! I love my Savior Jesus Christ. I know that he lives! He is real, and when I look at myself now, I am looking for him.

Michelle Iverson is a wife, mother, author, speaker, teacher and follower of Jesus Christ. She loves to share her insights and experiences through her writing and teaching and seeks to restore well-being to the lives of those who suffer. After experiencing sexual abuse in her childhood, and sexual addiction in her marriage, she and her husband Tyler have become passionate about sharing their story. Michelle’s true passion is helping women overcome adversity through the “sacred art of self-nurture.”

The post #BecauseofHim — Healing from Abuse and a Spouse’s Addiction appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

I know this is the true Church of our Savior Jesus Christ and that we are led by a living prophet, Thomas S. Monson.

My story:

My life challenges started at a very early age. I was eight years old when I was first molested. He was a friend of the family and I had a child’s love for him. He broke my heart and severely injured my spirit. Unable to tell my parents, my trust of people around me was shaken. I became very insecure and frightened of life. When I reached my teens, my insecurities and lack of participation in school activities became evident and a concerned counselor started drawing me out and I felt comforted by his concern. But, once again my life was jolted when he betrayed my trust. One day he offered me a ride home. I accepted his kind gesture. I soon realized he had other intentions. We took a ride into the hills near our town and the unspeakable happened. Once again I was shaken to the core and afraid to go to my parents. I had no idea how to deal with any of this and so I pushed the thoughts and feelings deep inside. I didn’t have any close friends at school and my insecurities became overwhelming.

I started going to a neighborhood church and felt some comfort but still I had no answers to why bad things were always happening to me. I was convinced that bad things only happened to bad people ant that I was being punished. I met a boy who belonged to another church and we started dating. School became increasingly harder for me to deal with. When I was sixteen and my boyfriend nineteen I convinced my parents to allow me to get married. I was then dropped out of school.

A couple of years into my marriage my husband and I started having very heated arguments. We were both so young and immature. It became an abusive relationship with my husband using physical force. After our son was born, I decided that the best thing for both me and my son was to leave this marriage. I was more fearful for my son than for myself. Once again I was left with the thought and feeling that I was a bad person.

It was very hard being a single mom at the young age of nineteen. I started having severe migraine headaches that often made it hard for me to go to work, or be a mother. I started suffering with depression as well. I had long since stopped going to church, I couldn’t see the point. My friends changed and my lifestyle became one that I am now ashamed of. And soon drugs became an escape from all my worries. At least I thought so at the time.

Even though this was a time of spiraling out of control, I did meet a man who was stable and who had healthy life goals and was willing to be a father to my son, and so, we were married and a year later we had a daughter. I still suffered with migraines and depression. I was also still painfully insecure and that was a problem for my very outgoing, enthusiastic husband.

At some point all of these physical, mental and social challenges became too overwhelming. Prescription drugs and illegal drugs became a part of my life again. I was what you would call a “functioning addict.” My marriage of seventeen years ended and I really went into a tailspin. I became so frightened of life. I was completely convinced that my life had no worth.

Mid-October 2004 I tried to end my life. I was found unconscious, barely breathing and rushed to the hospital. I was put on a respirator. My two sisters, one in California, and the other in Utah, were contacted by my former husband who is a doctor. They have since told me they thought they were coming to bury me.

After five days I regained consciousness and was taken off the respirator. My two sisters were standing by my bedside. Both my sisters have been members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints since they were in their teens. One of my sisters reached over the safety bar on the bed and laid her hand on my arm and asked me if I would like a priesthood blessing. At the same time that she asked that question there was a whisper in my other ear. Jesus whispered, “Are you ready to do it my way?” I knew it was Him because of how specific those words were to me. I also knew it was Jesus because of the love, warmth and comfort that fell on me. I have never felt such love in all my life! Such pure love! I said yes to both questions. Any questions I had about The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints were answered in that moment.

It’s my testimony that Jesus lives and his Atonement will make everything right. Heavenly Father’s love has healed me. I do not suffer from depression, overwhelming insecurities, nor do I feel like I’m a bad person. As my faith grows and my knowledge of the gospel grows I realize that bad things happen to good people. We are here to be tested. Our lives are subjected sometimes to those who choose to use their agency in a negative manner. When those times befall us, He will comfort us.

Before I was baptized, I worried about forgiveness. I worried about whether Heavenly Father would forgive me if I couldn’t forgive those who had trespassed against me. Matthew 6:14-15, “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” I talked to Elder Hansen (who was the missionary teaching me and who would be baptizing me) about my concerns and he suggested that I fast and pray. I also talked to the local Relief Society President. Sister Hunt loaned me her scriptures and showed me how to use the Topical Guide and the Bible Dictionary. I took her scriptures home, fasted, prayed and read scriptures that night and the next day. I can’t really say that I had any earth shaking revelations, but at some point, an indescribable peaceful feeling came upon me. I no longer had any ill feelings left and I was able to pray sincerely for those who had hurt me. I then felt like I could enter the baptismal waters and enter into those sacred covenants and start my journey of enduring to the end.

I know I’m not alone on this journey. I know that I can call on Heavenly Father, through Jesus Christ, to help me through any challenge and he will give me the strength to endure.

—

Editor’s note: This post originally appeared on this site on June 12, 2008.

The post When Bad Things Happen to Good People: One woman’s journey to overcome the effects of abuse and addiction appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

Parents, this is worth a read. Let’s help our teens avoid unhealthy relationships.

(These resources might also be helpful for adult women who think they may be in an abusive relationship.)

See also:

Indicators of healthy and abusive relationships.

Teen dating violence prevention statistics

http://www.ksl.com/?nid=148&sid=5782598“>Teen dating violence prevention toolbar

Please feel free to share other resources on this topic that might be helpful. We all probably know someone who has been in an abusive relationship. Let’s share information that can help women out there take care of themselves.

The post <i>Noteworthy News:</i> Resources and information about helping teens avoid violent and abusive relationships appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.