My name is Stephanie and I served in the Netherlands, Amsterdam Mission from August 1983 to February 1985.

I always had said I would serve a mission if I wasn’t married by the time I turned 21.  However, I met a young man just the February before my 21st birthday.  We started hanging out and dated.  The Spirit confirmed to me that I needed to serve a mission.  I told this young man, Dale, that I was going on my mission.  The night before going into the MTC (Missionary Training Center) he called and proposed to me.  I told him I needed to serve this mission.  We wrote letters back and forth until about half way through my mission when I was having a difficult time with companions and the work.  He was the only regular writer besides my parents so I took my frustrations out on him and sent him a “Dear John” [a letter essentially cutting off the relationship]. But the November before my mission ended, we started exchanging letters again.

When I look at my life now and knowing what has happened, the trials I have endured, I am very grateful for the missionary service that I did.  Dale was a convert to the church and so my service has been a big example to my children of the importance of missionary work.  Dale and I did get married August 1985, but he passed away in December 1993 leaving me to raise our four small children.  I think a mission helped prepare me for this experience in my life knowing and confirming deep within me the Plan of Salvation and that we can and will see our loved ones in the life after mortality.

A couple of experiences come to mind when I was on my mission where I knew God answered my prayers.  I hadn’t been out in the field long, it was cold and windy outside and we were proselyting door to door.  In Rotterdam Holland, there are high rises with many apartments where you stand downstairs and push a button and talk on the speaker. My companion and I were in a little entry way pushing buttons when something got in my eye. I rubbed it and realized my contact fell out.  Now this was in the time period that we didn’t have disposable contacts and they were expensive.  I didn’t have an extra pair and it was dark outside.  We looked on the ground but couldn’t see anything.  My companion and I said a prayer and still looked, but nothing.  We decided to call it a night and walked across the street to unlock our bikes and the impression came over me to look back to where we were.  I saw something shiny and told my companion to wait a minute. I went back and there it was, my contact lens.  I know that Heavenly Father had a hand in me finding my contact that night.

The other experience is from the time I served in Den Haag.  There was a nice older woman who had been seeing the missionaries for a long time and had always talked to the Elders.  In fact her son was already a member, but something kept her from joining the Church.  We would go over every week and give her a discussion and one day the Spirit prompted me to challenge her to be baptized.  She surprised us all by agreeing and was later baptized. I asked her after what had changed her mind after so many missionaries and her response was that it was something we had said.  Heavenly Father had worked through the Spirit to answer our prayers on how to show her the way.

My mission impacted my perspective on God’s love and of my own self worth.  It helped me to see that Heavenly Father loves all mankind and knew me and knew what I was in need of at those times.  It helped me to be more self confident and independent and know that I could have my own testimony and speak boldly of the Savior’s love and the truthfulness of the Gospel of Jesus Christ without relying on the testimony of my parents or leaders.

—-

For more Missionary Monday posts, please click here.

The post Mormon Mission Memories: Stephanie appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

My friend and I caught up on family news over lunch a few months ago. “How‘s your son doing at college?” she asked as we reviewed our children’s activities.

“Did I tell you he’s on a two-year leave of absence so that he can complete a mission for our church?”

“No,” she replied.

“He’s been gone about six months. I’m looking forward to Mother’s Day because I get to talk to him on the phone. The only other time I can do that is on Christmas Day,” I explained.

“You’re kidding.” She shrugged. “That must be hard.”

I knew Sarah was putting her response mildly. Many non-LDS people can’t believe that a mother could send her child to a location anywhere in the world that is not her choosing for two years (18 months for women). “I’d never do that to my son,” an acquaintance once told me when we were discussing LDS missions.

Do I miss my son? Is it difficult to be apart for two years with only letters and emails to keep us connected? Do I worry about his health and how other people are treating him? You bet! Would I want it any other way? Absolutely not. My son is a bright, friendly young man who completed his freshman year at a Baltimore college before leaving on his mission. His college friends are supportive, but incredulous. Two months into his mission I received a letter that warmed my heart:

“I am grateful to be here and wish so much you could be here with me experiencing such miracles. What we get to do as missionaries . . . is so humbling. It is hard to describe . . . I want you to know that I love you more than you know and that I love our Savior and that I am glad you and certain others [helped] get me here.”

From Self-Centered to Self-Less

As parents, we want our children to have the best in life–the best opportunities, good friends, success in school, and health. From the time they are born, our children claim the center of our attention. If they cry as babies, our immediate goal is to eliminate any discomfort. We nurture and encourage, feed, clothe and provide shelter. Not surprisingly, our children respond by believing that their needs are more important than anything or anyone else.

We can counteract self-centered behavior when we teach our children to share their toys, when we ask for their help preparing dinner for a sick neighbor or when we assign our children chores, like taking out the garbage, to help our homes run smoothly.

Imagine what can happen when we focus entirely on helping others for an extended period of time. A mission is an incredible opportunity to do just that. My son spends six days a week dressed in a suit and tie, riding a bicycle, meeting and talking to anyone with an interest. He reserves one day a week [called preparation day, or P-day] for laundry, grocery shopping, and writing home. He has helped people move, clean, and do yard work. He assisted a single woman to stop smoking, encouraged an alcoholic father to give up drinking, introduced a single mother of two to a new “church family”–one that supports her by providing activities for her children and a place to socialize and discuss values that build families. He spends hours studying in order to effectively share his understanding of how to find joy with others. His letters include phrases like, “I have come to love him.” They describe tender experiences with people like the 93 year-old woman he met at a bus stop:

“She told us some moving stories about how she migrated here from Lithuania during World War II and how she went through all these hard times, but through it all gained a testimony of God. She didn’t really want to talk about our religion but it was just amazing to sit and listen to her.”

Developing Skills & Talents

Mormon missionaries work as pairs. They are assigned a companion to live and work with. Learning to get along with companions from a variety of different backgrounds teaches tolerance and patience—valuable skills for any friend or future spouse. My brother-in-law recalled that his mission was where he had learned to be a “better father and husband.”

Missionaries serve without compensation, many earning the $400 a month required for service before leaving for the “mission field” or assigned area. Missionaries receive a modest monthly amount to pay for food, expenses like bike repairs or a haircut. My son is developing budgeting skills and learning how to be frugal. He proudly sent me a photograph of one of his “budget dinners”—a bowl full of noodles sprinkled with something resembling shrimp.

Before he left, my Stake President (congregational leader) advised my son to utilize his talents on his mission. My son is serving an English-speaking mission, but many missionaries learn foreign languages as they serve in countries around the world. “I’ve played the piano just about every week in church,” my son reported a few weeks into his first mission area (missionaries can be transferred to a new area as frequently as every six weeks). At college, my son was a music minor who taught piano and played the saxophone in a jazz ensemble. He describes a memorable event in another letter:

“This Saturday night will be our musical fireside. I am pretty much organizing and playing every song. It’s gonna be sweet. We have choral numbers, quartets, guitar and piano medleys. I have a couple of solos, and even one of our investigators and I are playing some gospel versions and hymns. My favorite is our arrangement with the whole zone singing Come Thou Fount as well as a medley of Praise to the Man and We Thank Thee, O God, for a Prophet where I get to go wild! I’m excited.”

Blossoming Leadership

Six months into his mission my son was assigned to be a “trainer”—a senior companion who tutors new missionaries on how to accomplish their duties. A trainer sets an example of leadership by demonstrating hard work, spiritual strength, and a willingness to meet and teach others even when it is difficult or uncomfortable.

During his ninth month of service, he became a “district leader” with responsibility for six missionaries in his area. In addition to tracking their physical well-being, my son prepares weekly training sessions. “[I] . . . planned a meeting about unity since the district is pretty new and we don’t know each other,” he wrote home. He noted that during a role play activity the sister (female) missionaries, “just went at it, tearing into each other . . . loud enough that everyone else in the room could hear—very uncomfortable.” One of the sisters called later that night to say that the role play was just what she and her companion needed to work out their differences.

Developing Spiritual Maturity

It is easy to put our finger on the tangible elements of success–a college degree, a thriving career, a comfortable home or opportunities for interesting travel. These elements are important, but they are only part of what I believe is a complete life, one that includes helping others and feeding our spiritual hunger–the search for answers about the meaning of our existence, what it means to have peace, and where we can find the ultimate source of our desire to be “good.”

I believe we learn truth through the heart as well as through the mind. Knowing and understanding spiritual truths is what I (and most Mormons) call a testimony. It begins with a feeling in the heart–a warm sense when we do something good or learn something that rings true. Consider a time when you did something that made you feel good. At work, I have had several opportunities to volunteer in my community serving lunch at a homeless shelter, planting trees at a local zoo, and setting up tables for a fundraising dinner for a non-profit foundation. I came away from these activities feeling happy that I was able to do something worthwhile. These warm feelings are the same “messages of the heart” sent from God that can come when we learn spiritual truths or truths that bring us pure joy.

On his mission, my son has been able to cultivate and refine his quest for spiritual truth in order to share it with others. Excerpts from several letters describe his growing spiritual maturity:

“We see miracles all the times, what a privilege.”

“The Lord truly blesses us when we always do what we are supposed to do.”

“This week I am focusing on faith, always believing anything can happen. Such a simple principle but hard to actually do. . .”

“This week I want to just bear my testimony. I know the church is true, without a shadow of a doubt.”

I Would Do It All Over Again

The brief conversation I had with my friend over lunch is something I hope to repeat many times in the upcoming months. I enjoy explaining what my son is doing as an LDS missionary and how I feel about it as his mother.

When my son returns from his mission, he will be two years older and no further along in school –but he will have developed a number of priceless character traits. He will return a sensitive, giving, talented, and spiritual mature leader who will have lifted the lives of the many people he will have met, served, and taught.

Would I do it all over again? Of course.
—-
For more Missionary Mondays posts, please click here.

The post Ask a Mormon Woman: Why Do Mothers Send Their Children on Missions? appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.

This is Gladys. She is a Mormon Woman, lives in Canada, and today is her 87th birthday! (This picture was taken nearly 5 years ago with one of her great-grandsons.)

Gladys was born the youngest of 11 children –today, she is the only living sibling in her immediate family. Her parents came from Utah and settled in Canada before she was born. She has been a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints her entire life, and she loves the gospel.

Gladys worked as a phone operator for 10 years, in a bank for 1 1/2 years in Salt Lake City (Utah), taught in schools as an aid in Idaho and Canada, and managed an LDS (Mormon) bookstore for 12 1/2 years. She retired at the age of 70! But her longest career so far has been that of a mother. She has 6 children, 21 grandchildren, 30 great-grandchildren (with 2 more on the way), and 1 great-great-grandchild.

For 43 years and 8 months, Gladys was married to the love of her life. He died nearly 11 years ago, but she says she still feels close to him in the Temple. One time, a grandchild asked her why she didn’t visit her husband’s grave at the cemetery. Gladys responded: “I know he is not there in the cemetery. His spirit is elsewhere; that’s just his body. When I want to feel close to my husband, I go to the Temple. That is where I can feel him and feel his love for me. Going there reminds me that I will see him again, soon.”

Gladys has many hobbies and talents. Some of them include: playing the organ and piano, singing, dancing, making angel food cakes and chocolates from scratch, and traveling. Dancing was always a part of her life. For decades, she would attend dances nearly 3 times a week. She even met her husband at a dance. “That was a different time,” she says of the dances. “We danced real dances back then; it was exercise!” Another hobby Gladys enjoys is visiting as many Temples as she can. To date, she has been to 19 different Mormon Temples. She loves to travel and has been to Lima, Peru; Jerusalem; Hawaii; and all over the United States and parts of Canada.

When Gladys was in her late 20’s, she had the opportunity to serve a mission for the Mormon Church. She was called to labor for 20 months in the Eastern United States Mission from 1948 to 1950. Of this experience, Gladys says, “Serving a mission strengthened my testimony greatly. We would track every day and usually I was the only one who could play the piano in the branches and wards (congregations). I served a month in Philadelphia (Pennsylvania), and then did the Hill Cumorah Pageant (A Witness for Christ) in Palmyra, New York, and practiced every day. Being around the Sacred Grove and places where the Church was restored really strengthened my testimony. Afterwards, I went to Norwich, New York for a year to serve…”

Recently, Gladys was a Visiting Teaching supervisor in her ward [congregation], and she served as a Temple Patron for 2 years (Temple Patrons are asked to attend the Temple twice a week during their call). When asked what she loves the most about being a Mormon Woman, she said: “Families can be together forever because we have Temples. I know I’ll see my family again. Also, we are taught from a young age the law of health (Word of Wisdom) which has given me health for life. I truly believe I am healthy because of it!

I’m 87 years old and doing great. I’m still active. I still love to be in my kitchen dipping 50 pounds of chocolates a year. I also make 150-200 cakes a year. Also, because we were taught to stay physically active, I was able to dance for many years. I know the gospel is a gift, and I’m grateful to have it in my life.”

——-
For more Portraits of Mormon Women, please click here.

The post Portraits of Mormon Women: Gladys appeared first on Women in The Church of Jesus Christ.