I regret not having children most of all, but have found comfort in my relationships with my nieces, nephews, and grand nieces and nephews. I also enjoy connecting with the children in the ward. They bring me much happiness and comfort. So belonging to a ward family has, in many ways, compensated for not having my own immediate family.

I attended a Singles Ward for many years, while I attended the University and while working as an educator, thinking I would be an ‘outcast’ in a family ward. But I discovered this was not the case when I returned to my home ward. I found a most accepting atmosphere and a love that sustains me weekly. The older women are like my mom and the younger ones, like my sisters. They care about me and for me when I need someone.

I must admit there are times when it is hard to listen to sermons or lessons about family and the eternal nature of the family and the wonderful blessing children are, but…. those times are far fewer than the wonderful messages I hear about my worth as a child of God and my opportunities to serve others, and the many ideas for improving my life, as well as moving toward eternal life with my Father in Heaven. I have been taught that I will have a chance to have an eternal mate and even have children in the eternities. I know without a shadow of doubt that my Father in Heaven loves me and will provide for me that which I need to experience eternal joy.

My roommate’s mother was divorced and called to be the Stake Relief Society President a few years ago. She believed that would be wrong, since a president should be an’ example’ and she felt she had failed in her marriage. Her Stake President reassured her that she was as worthy and as needed in that role as any married sister was. I believe that is what the Lord believes. Women are called to serve because of who they are, not because of their marital status. Be assured that you are as important to and loved by your Father in Heaven as any other woman on this earth.

I testify that the Gospel of Jesus Christ is a gospel of love and provides a plan of salvation that will help all of us to return to Him. It is meant for everyone! I testify that the Lord loves all of us equally and greatly and will help us find joy in what ever circumstance we find ourselves. I am so grateful for His goodness to me and for the opportunity to be a member of His Church and serve in my ward and to associate with the special people in my ward. May God help you in your endeavors to find for the truth and find the happiness you seek.

I also felt I should tell you that I believe that a lot of our experiences for good or bad can be based on our attitudes. Once I knew I was going to be divorced I made a goal that I would choose not to be offended by topics or things that people might carelessly say at church. We’re all human and we all say things that can hurt others. I knew I didn’t want to be the person who was offended by every little remark. It has been a great blessing to me. I readily admit, there are times that talking about eternal families is hard. There are challenges that come with being single. However, I am a witness that with those challenges come blessings.

God loves each of us individually. You and I are His daughters. He knows each of your heartaches and every one of your joys. He knows and understands what you have lived through in your life. He knows every mistake we have ever made and He loves us anyway. When you have moments where you feel you may not fit in, remember that you fit into His plan. He holds you in His arms and will help you through those challenging moments. After all, life is challenging; that’s how we learn. I can’t promise you won’t face challenges with this, but I can promise that God will be with you every step of the way. I pray that you’ll be able to feel His love for you and find the answers for which you are searching.

From even that first conversation, I felt love and support. When I moved into the ward, I was quickly given a responsibility working with the young women. Later on, I was asked to play the piano for the choir, and then to be in charge of planning activities for the entire ward. (It was one of the busiest and most fulfilling times of my life — as I tried to jump in and be involved, I found I was needed. I look back now and see that I could serve in ways others couldn’t because my ward was my family. Truth be told, sometimes I miss that!)

Perhaps it would be worth noting that the woman who was leading the Relief Society in the ward (the organization for the adult women ages 18+) when I moved in was a divorced woman in her 30s or 40s.

This was a ward where I felt that there truly was no respecter of persons. We had people from many races, backgrounds, time in the Church, family situations. The differences didn’t matter. We were just all a ward family. We loved being together. They became my family. When I needed help and support, I had friends and leaders who were there to listen. When I moved, people were there to fill and empty my U-haul. My married friends took me on temple trips with them.

Don’t get me wrong. There were definitely lonely moments. I know the experiences of a younger single person won’t necessarily be perfectly translatable. There were times it was hard to not be married. I still have vivid memories of tear-filled conversations with people at such times.

But even then, I found that when I opened up and asked for help, people were there.

Ah. Makes me want to go back and visit them all! 🙂 I love you, SP 1st ward friends!

My husband has been a home teacher to many single women. I know he worries and cares about these women and their struggles. He has taken their sons to Father and Son activities, boating and to work with him. He has gone over many times at any hour of the day to administer Priesthood blessings in times of sickness. I have heard him mention them in his prayers. We never want the single sisters to feel that they do not have access to all the blessings of the Gospel.

I have many single friends in my congregation. I know some days and some topics taught at church can be tough. It is hard to sing Hymns like “Families Can be Together Forever” when the sting of divorce is still very raw. But during those times when a woman in the congregation pulls out a Kleenex to dab the tears that have welled from obvious grief, I have seen women stand up during the painful moment and move closer to throw an arm of love around the shoulders of the saddened.

I loved the quotes shared above from President Hinckley and Elder Faust. Single members are “fellow citizens” and part of the body of Christ that Paul describes in the Bible. We love them and see them as part of our ward family.

I appreciated Karen’s response to your question. I hope you will consider visiting an LDS congregation near you to see how it feels. And know that, through prayer, we are never have to be truly and completely alone.